A Prayer: Your Narrow Path

My Lord,

I find myself here, on this road that seems abandoned and forsaken. You have led me down to Your narrow path of righteousness, away from the paths that were comfortable and known for me, and the paths were I enjoyed company. And now I am learning to be alone without being alone. I am learning to be strong when I am weak, and to experience joy at my pain. I am learning to run with You, my God. 

And Father, as I started to run, I made an effort to be aware of my surroundings. The unleveled terrain, the loose gravel, the tripping stones, potential dangers, and I planned accordingly. 

I tripped, Lord. I fell, Father. I am bleeding, my God.

How much easier was it to run on the path that I was used to! The one that hundreds of runners ran before me! My strength has failed me; my own knowledge has been proven to be foolish. 

But in spite of it all, this is where I must be. You have called me here; You have led me here.





And Peter answered Him and said, “Lord, if it is You, command me to come to You on the water.”

So He said, “Come.” And when Peter had come down out of the boat, he walked on the water to go to Jesus. 




God, I want to follow you. I want to walk in your narrow path. I want to run this good race. I wan to have bigger faith. I want to hear You more clearly. I want to be used by You. Send me out; I will go. Make me more like Jesus. Conform my will to yours. Make me stronger, wiser, better. 


All right here I go... I can do this. Just point me in the right direction. I have everything I need, God. I got this.




But when he saw that the wind was boisterous, he was afraid; and beginning to sink...

Plan B. Then Plan C, D, E, F, G... Where am I? What am I doing? Where am I even going? Why am I here? I can't do this... Help me God. 

he cried out, saying, “Lord, save me!”

My Lord, when were You removed from the notion of "walking with You?" When was Your strength deemed unnecessary? When were You not enough? When did I forget Psalms 73:25? When did prayer become the last resort, instead of the most potent weapon? When did my non-existant righteousness become my shield in place of my salvation which comes You and only You?

And immediately Jesus stretched out His hand and caught him, and said to him, “O you of little faith, why did you doubt?” And when they got into the boat, the wind ceased.

Keep me on Your narrow path, my God; this path that is so little travelled. Be my strength, God. Make me weak, so that You would show Yourself strong. Break me, so that Your light can shine through this jar of clay. Remind me that I am dust, and remind the price You paid... a price beyond what I could ever afford. I am not forsaken, not forgotten. Though this road may be painful, it is the safest road I can be on. You are before me, behind me, all around me. You break my bones so that I could never leave Your side. You heal my brokenness so that I could see You as my provider. You show me weakness so that I can utterly depend on Your strength. I need you... like oxygen... and that's where You want me... And can there be a better place? Never. Who else can I be vulnerable with but the one that loves me to death.... Literally...

In my distress I called upon the Lord,

And cried out to my God;

He heard my voice from His temple,

And my cry came before Him, even to His ears.

The Inclined Ear: Thoughts on Prayer

I love the Lord because he hears my voice and my prayer for mercy.
Because he bends down to listen, I will pray as long as I have breath!

-Psalms 116:1-2 NLT

I remember the day my nephew Max was born. What a momentous occasion! My very first nephew after 4 beautiful, precious, little nieces. I flew to the hospital after work, ran into the my sister’s hospital room to catch a glimpse of the young man that just inherited a special piece of my heart. That day my heart was divided in 5... And my zeal was not unmatched by my 2 other sisters, my parents, my brother-in-law and other close friends. That room was brimming with excitement; the little space we occupied was spinning with joy due to this exciting addition to our family. And amidst the heartwarming noise and loving chaos, I heard a faint little voice calling my name... 

“Tio Carlos...”

The little voice seemed to drown in the sea of laughter, cooing, and cheerful tears.

“Tio Carlos...”

This time the tiny voice brought with it a stern pull on my shirt. It was my oldest niece, Grace, whose little 5-year old voice didn’t stand a chance against a boisterous Hispanic family and a relentless new born baby boy’s cries. There’s no way I could hear what she so persistently wanted to tell me unless I got down to this insistent young lady’s level, eye-to-eye, face-to-face.

I got down on one knee, gave her a hug, and said, “Yes, my baby, what do you need?”

“Tio Carlos... I’m hungry...”

I grabbed her by the hand, and that night, I shared dinner with my determined 5-year old niece, courtesy of the hospital’s late night vending machines.

So, here comes the obvious application... Would you believe that God, who loves you more than anyone else has ever loved you, gets down to meet you eye to eye, face to face, and inclines his ear to what you have to tell Him? The God who gave the Sun it’s terrifying power, and perfectly positioned this gigantic ball of energy in the most perfect location in the Milky Way, so that we may have a breathtaking view of the heavens, also inclines His ear at your cry. He bends down to listen, through all the chaos on Earth and all the glory on Heaven, He clears the way to you, through the clouds, His light cuts through to hear what you have to ask of Him. He moves at the sound of your voice.

“...men’s prayers today are one of the innumerable coordinates with which [God] harmonises the weather of tomorrow...” –CS Lewis, The Screwtape Letters

I think of Abraham’s servant who, upon being tasked with finding a wife for Isaac, prayed a very specific prayer for a very specific person (Gen 24).

Now let it be that the young woman to whom I say, ‘Please let down your pitcher that I may drink,’ and she says, ‘Drink, and I will also give your camels a drink’—let her be the one You have appointed for Your servant Isaac. And by this I will know that You have shown kindness to my master.” Gen 24:14

And before the servant even finished his prayer, Rebekah appeared. Some might classify the entire situation as a coincidence, a random pattern of events that would have happened even if Eliezer, Abraham’s servant hand’t prayed. But could I persuade you to believe that God already knew Eliezer would pray for this unique individual, and could I be bold enough to declare to you that God Himself inspired the prayer in Eleizer’s heart? Should that persuade complacency in us to pray? NO WAY! On the contrary, it fuels our passion for it, that God foresees our future requests in His unabounded Now.  How amazing that God should pay such attention to us, that time would have no boundaries. Just as our Lord stood still at the fervent cry of a blind man, our voices move His compassion in such a way today.

My Support Team and I had an amazing prayer night last night. We lifted up the people of Peru, my family, and many other things... And with all certainty I can assure you that God inclined His ear to hear us, as He does with you.

The Beginning of My Journey: 40 more days...

So this is me... 

This is the beginning of my journey... 

This is my relentless journey into the unknown... my high speed, head first lunge towards the obscure world of cross-cultural ministry. This is my journey into intransigence and remorselessness; my heart-suffocating, uncompromising desire to be desperate, weak, broken, and dependent... Dependent on and desperate for the Man who gave everything He had so that this world could behold Him and be reunited with Him and His plan from the beginning (John 17:24; Ephesians 1:10). What does this desperation entail? Honestly, I HAVE NO IDEA. But I know the first step that God has asked of me.

Carlos... Go to Peru.

Some consider me a madman. A raging lunatic who has just agreed to leave his family, his beloved friends, his yellow labrador retriever (Oliver), sold his most prized possessions, left his job that took him 9 years to come to, forsaken the education he has received, the country and culture he was born and raised in. 

I work for a major commercial bank, and I meet many, many people every day. I met a man who is a millionaire with enough to take care of himself and his family for the rest of his existence. In the normal course of dialogue I shared with him a glimpse of my journey... 

“So... You’re going to Peru, huh? Do you have at least $100,000.00 saved up?”

“Nope, not even close.”

“Well, then you have a job out there! How much are they paying you?”

“Nothing.”

“How long have you been in banking?”

“Nine years.”

“And you’re just leaving?”

“Yep.”

Silence... then he says:

“Here’s my email. I want pictures, emails, all that stuff. You’re crazy.”

I couldn’t help but chuckle. I must say, the guy had a very colorful personality and way of expressing himself. But just like I had a friend tell me last night, Hell is a real place. And a terrifying one. Not too many Christians truly believe in hell. They have intellectual knowledge of it, but they don’t really understand the gravity of what God has saved them from. If they did... They would go into their neighborhoods, burst into their relatives’ houses with a Bible in their trembling hands... They would go into all the world, fueled by His passions, His burdens to save the world that He paid such a high price to save. 

Mind you, not everyone will go into cross cultural ministry. Some, like the demon possessed man who upon receiving his deliverance, was commanded by Jesus to go to his home and declare the great things The Lord has done (Mark 5:18-20). But the Bible is missions. A friend and missionary mentor of mine said something that resonated... Every Christian has three options. Go, send, or be disobedient. 

I hope that this journey, should you choose to follow me on it brings clarity to what God would have you do in our planet, His mission field. 

If you can’t go, then send. 

Send me. I’m sure you’re asking how do I serve as a sender. Well, prayer is the most important/powerful way. I would encourage you to read Serving as Senders by Neal Pirolo. Do nothing without consultation with The Lord. Hear from Him. He may already be speaking to you. 

So now, details... It is my sincere commitment to have a weekly update on this blog. 

I leave August 9^th and I would that it be sooner... But God’s timing is perfect. 

You can always contact me through this blog, and any financial support can also be accepted on here, although don’t expect me to solicit anything from you. As I said.. prayer, prayer, prayer is key. 

My friends, I leave with you this...

You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. -Deut 6:5 ESV

-Carlos